By Resna Marie Brunson
The Oxford Dictionary defines resolution as “a firm decision to do or not to do something/the quality of being determined or resolute.” Have you made a list of New Year’s resolutions? Some of the most popular resolutions are: saving money, losing weight, getting a new job, relocating, closer connections, and taking better care of our health. Most would agree it is good to make positive changes. So what accounts for many New Year’s Resolutions dissolving or simply forgotten before mid January or “quitter’s day.” Not taking everything into consideration and not having a realistic plan of action (which may extend beyond one year) may be the reason many find themselves feeling disappointed, frustrated, and hopeless soon after they say “Happy New Year.”
What needs to be done in order to experience positive results? We must first examine our motives by asking ourselves questions. Let’s explore a familiar one from our list above: losing weight. What is the reason I want to lose weight? Will it be better for my health? Do I want to purchase special attire for an upcoming event? Do I dislike who I see in the mirror? Do I think weight is the cause of my loneliness? Do I want to feel better? After asking ourselves questions we need to pinpoint “what is true?” Yes, it may be true that I am experiencing loneliness and yes losing weight is beneficial BUT is it really the root cause of my loneliness? After exploring our questions we next need a feasible plan. The vision board concept is great. But without a strategy it remains “a vision.” Instead, I like to suggest the term “action board.” There are less images with a concrete and reasonable plan to meet goals. Let’s continue with weight loss. What is a realistic goal? What do I need to do/stop doing to meet my goal? What will be the hurdles and can I prepare myself to jump over them? Am I really willing to make these changes?
Oftentimes, making outward changes is more manageable than making changes within. I may be able to change my diet and exercise habits but my thoughts and feelings about myself may not differ even if I am a few sizes smaller.
The beginning of a New Year may be a time to ask if it is beneficial to have someone to help identify root causes and explore/question our inner/emotional resolutions.
Ready to take the next step?
